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Funniest E-DZ Member Of July!!

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#1
writersfreedom

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:salaam:

One of the things I like the most about E-DZ is how funny our members are ;)

But which one of us is the funniest ??
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Well this topic is our chance to find out!


We will each post 2 jokes one joke a post so 2 post = 2 jokes a member :D

The member who gets the most +1's from both of his posts combined together will be E-DZ's funniest member in July!! (everyone can vote , even the members posting their jokes as well)

you have till the 28th of July to submit your jokes and you don't have to post both of them at the same time , for example one post = one joke this week and the other one 3 days later.

(jokes only no pictures or videos please :D)

Let the Laughing Begins ;)

What can my enemies possibly do to me? My paradise is in my heart; wherever I go it goes with me, insepa­rable from me. For me, prison is a place of (religious) retreat; ex­ecution is my opportunity for martyrdom; and exile from my town is but a chance to travel ......

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#2
Snow White Queen

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Nice idea indeed WF :rockon: ,we will be starting that soon inchAllah !
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#3
writersfreedom

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Thank u sis ^_^ , looking forward to it ;)

#4
writersfreedom

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A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car.

His father said he'd make a deal with his son : 'You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, and get your hair cut. Then we'll talk about the car.'

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer, and they agreed on it.

After about six weeks his father said, 'Son, you've brought your grades up and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'm disappointed you haven't had your hair cut.

The boy said, 'You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair...and there's even strong evidence that Jesus had long hair.'



To this his father replied, 'Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they went?'

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#5
Fatony

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hehe hayla WF.

There was a plane going from London to New York and it was full of people from all different nationalities. So half way through the journey, the pilot spoke on the telecom and said, ladies and gentlemen we have some bad news. We dont think we have enough fuel to get us to our destination due to the heavy load. We need 3 people to jump out and sacrifice themselves in order to save others.

So the first person to stand up was an American, who went to the front of the plane. Before he jumped out he shouted: God Bless America.
Next person to stand up is the Russian. He went to the front and shouted: For Mathar Rassia.

Then there was silence, no body stoop up.. Five minutes later, an Algerian stood up and went to the front of the plane. All the Arabs started to clap and felt proud that an Arab fellow is going to honor them. The Algerian turns around and goes: 3lash rakoum tsefgou!! will somebody help me throw this Indian out?


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There are people with experience and people with opinions. Listen to one, smile at the other.
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#6
- Mohammed

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A pub landlord is shutting up for the night when there is a knock at the door. When he answers, a Tramp asks him for a tooth-pick. He gives him the toothpick and the tramp goes off.

A few minutes later there is a second knock. When he answers, there is a second Tramp who also asks for a toothpick. He gets his toothpick and off he goes.

There is a third knock at the door, and a third Tramp. The landlord says, "Don't tell me, you want a toothpick too."

"No, a straw," says the Tramp.

The landlord gives him a straw but is curious as to why he wants it, so he asks the Tramp why he wants a straw and not a toothpick.

To which the Tramp replies, "Some bloke just threw up outside but all the good stuff's gone already".

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A day spent without learning is a day wasted

#7
- Mohammed

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Dear e-dz.com ,

I have 23 jokes and I can't understand why any of them haven't scored very well.

Fabio.

#8
writersfreedom

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:salaam:

LOL! @ Fato and Muhammed ,

+1 Fato , cuz I didn't see it coming lol

What a twisted sense of Humor ur first joke is Muhammed ... enjoyed it and didn't see it coming at ALL +1 , lool :D


#9
Snow White Queen

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Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let's start from your bank account

* * * * * * *
Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?"
Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?
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#10
Beebo

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A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.

Three years later, there's a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the heck was that all about?"


------------------------------------------------


once 3 guys M3askri, Dziri and Wahrani robbed a jewlery store. When the police came, they found the M3askri standing there so they arrested him and asked him why he didn't run away. He said "we agreed that the dziri takes the cash, the wahrani takes the jewlery and I take the store".
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WgxUpZ6.png


#11
Apocalypse

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:lol: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh @ I take to store hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


#12
wise-man001

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh! The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: The driver just insulted me!

The man says: You go right up there and tell him off go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you"


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Be the change you want to see in the world.

#13
abdel

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I would like to participate but am not good at telling jokes especially in English :(
anyways It's a great Idea...I like it.

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O刀乇 イ₩O イけ尺乇乇 √ノ√ム し'ムしE乇尺ノ乇

#14
abdel

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Looking forward to see the winner !!!

#15
Omeymaa

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once this guy who was s7ab berra /no offence to s7ab berra lol Posted Image/ was going from his wilaya to Alger..alors this on guy asked him..kho wirrak rayeh ? ..he told him rani rayeh lel 3asima, wenta? he said ana rani rayeh lAlger..el mouhim..it happens that they met again in kharroba !! so both of them were like machi qoltli rak rayeh lel 3asima/ lAlger ? msaken they were both confused, so they decided to ask someone where they train they were about to board leads to..he told them ldzayer!!! so they wre like...chof..tba7arna !!! Posted Image


cnt think of another one atm srry Posted Image
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Done is better than perfect.


#16
Apocalypse

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There once were two Irishmen, named Shawn and Pat, who were the best of friends. During one particular night of revelry, the two agreed that when one passed on, the other would take and spill the contents of a bottle of fine, Irish whiskey over the grave of the fondly missed and recently dead friend.

And as fate would have it, Shawn would be the first to pass. Pat, hearing of his friends illness, came to visit his dear friend one last time. Shawn, said Pat, can you hear me? Faintly, Shawn replied, Yes, Paddy, I can. Bashfully, Pat started, Do you remember our pact, Shawn? Yes, I do Patty, Shawn strained. And, youll also remember that I was to pour the contents of a fine, old bottle of whiskey over your grave, which we have been saving for, going on 30 years now? said Pat. Yes Patty, I do, whispered Shawn. Its a very old bottle now, you know, urged Pat. And what are you gettin at Pat? asked Shawn, briskly. Well Shawn, when I pour the whiskey over your grave, would ya mind if I filter it through my kidneys first

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#17
kamylood

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I would like to participate but am not good at telling jokes especially in English



Welcome to the club !

Hey !


#18
writersfreedom

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:salaam:

@ Abdel and Kam About E-DZ Funniest Member =)

#19
Revolution

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Zoudj bnate rahou djewzou examen, oua7da Passate, loukhra Clio :D
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#20
Fatony

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haha rev, i know another one like that.

Gallek wahed shra zouj klaab. Wahed Chienlou et wahed Smaanlou. :D
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